Photo by mix909 on Unsplash

She drinks beer

She Eats bURGERS

Her SKIN is NATURAL

MAKEUP?

HA! she doesn’t know her!

Breast Implants?

What are THOSE?!

She Doesn’t Shop.

No!

She Plays VIDEO GAMES!

.

.

(i think i am in love!)

Part of my parody poem series. It’s literally all my bad poetry. Some…

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Photo by Ethan Robertson on Unsplash

Would ya be offended if I compared ya to a summer’s day? (Oh screw it, I’ll do it anyway!)

U r nice and temperature

Like a hurricane destroying flowers in May

Summer vacation is much too shortature

The sun burns my flesh and shines

But tans yours so angrily

Eventually…

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Photo by Tengyart on Unsplash

Her eyes are the color of gold

They most certainly do not remind me of mold

If swimming in melted gold didn’t cause such pain

I would wish to dive into her eyes again

How I love the color of her eyes

They remind me of a winter sunrise

Dear…

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Photo by Jordan Whitfield on Unsplash

I play the piano

She smokes a cigarette

The room fills with a smoky haze

Just like her eye shadow

I kiss her ruby red lips

She kisses me back

She tastes like an ashtray

I hate it

Part of my parody poem series. It’s literally all my bad poetry…

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Photo by Oziel Gómez on Unsplash

I thought I loved her

Her soft skin

Her beautiful eyes

Her gorgeous hair

But it turns out

I only loved

the

idea

of

her

Part of my parody poem series. It’s literally all my bad poetry. Some of it is deliberately bad. Some of it I wrote when I thought I could write poetry. Guess what category this belongs to?

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Viktor Athelstan

Viktor Athelstan

Known as The Mediaeval Monk on Instagram, Viktor Athelstan writes about medieval monks, magic, and more. On Medium he writes about whatever he wants.